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Paraguay Panics After Discovering Rich Deposit Of Natural Resources

Trending story found on www.theonion.com
Paraguay Panics After Discovering Rich Deposit Of Natural Resources
TORO PAMPA, PARAGUAY—Cursing their luck after scientists confirmed their nation’s worst fears had been realized, officials in Paraguay were reportedly panicking Wednesday after discovering a rich deposit of natural resources. “Goddammit, this is tens of billions of dollars’ worth of rhodium, if not more—we’re sitting right on an absolute disaster for Paraguay if word ever gets out that this is here,” said visibly nervous President Mario Abdo Benîtez, warning the scientists who had stumbled upon the discovery while working on another project that if they cared about the future of the Paraguayan people, they should do whatever they could to...
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